Up in the front, the faces of middle school tweens and their mom's are glued firmly on the stage. Mixed in and just behind the front row are the high school and college freshmen Twittering things on the live screen like "OMGz Katy Perry!" and "don't tell Dan about the herpes." Young couples were present though it was painfully obvious the boyfriends were there only because of a promise of getting laid. And then there were the single men looking to swim in the estrogen fest. Yes, everyone was there for one single reason: Sex.
Sure I was there to have a good time and I'm always looking to meet some capable Tampa Bay cuties, but I had no idea what to expect. Twelve year old girls dressed in the hippest of middle school chic looked on the cusp of innocence and debauchery. Moms looked sidetracked, thinking about how much they wanted to fuck Neil Diamond thirty years ago. The girls with boyfriends were fantasizing about lesbian trysts while their boyfriends were thinking the same thing. Myself, well I was apparently one of the specials on the menu because the single ladies and the newly divorced cougars, fresh off Wysteria Lane were throwing free drinks at the Rabid one.
The hits were sung. Katy gave a great, "what the fuck is up with this pole?" remark in regards to Jannus' unique stage setup. Covers of Queen and the Outfield were sprinkled in. And finally, just about everyone got what they wanted; to fantasize in a sexy, pop music orgy, desperately trying to escape their daily troubles. I mean hell, the guy standing next to me literally said, "is your Kitty Purry?" and even that bastard looked like he was going to get laid. Now if you'll excuse me I have to wipe the cherry chapstick off my junk.
[youtube]
Pandemic? We don't need no stinkin' pandemic. The world might be in a state of blinding fear but you wouldn't know it by looking at the faces in the crowd at Katy Perry's bay area appearance on 4/28. The Rabid one was a part of the wily crowd and has to say, sex was flowing in the air and it had a palpable taste.
She kissed a girl and hell yeah she liked it. Her pseudo lesbian moment brought the people out en mass to Jannus Landing in St. Petersburg. Ok, I know what you're thinking, "who cares about pop music's current female sensation?" But a quick study of the mostly estrogen fueled audience yields fascinating results.
Since 1988, CL Tampa Bay has served as the free, independent voice of Tampa Bay, and we want to keep it that way.
Becoming a CL Tampa Bay Supporter for as little as $5 a month allows us to continue offering readers access to our coverage of local news, food, nightlife, events, and culture with no paywalls.
