2 FAST 2 FURIOUS (PG-13) It's hard to imagine that once-respectable director John Singleton is responsible for this tepid time-waster, a sequel so shoddy it makes the idiotic but entertaining original look like Citizen Kane. Former cop and driver extraordinaire Brian O'Connor (blander-than-ever Paul Walker) is back, this time teamed with a fast-talking black buddy (Tyrese) and working undercover to set up a nasty Miami drug lord. The script is mindless, the acting atrocious, and not even the action scenes are particularly exciting (the biggest crowd-pleasers are a couple of cars flying through the air — shots not too far removed from what you'd see on an old Dukes of Hazard rerun). Add some painfully forced repartee between the salt and pepper leads and a hot Latina babe in the wings — whose main credentials seem to be possessing both Gina Gershon's lips and Cindy Crawford's mole — and you've got a near-total bust. Eye candy, pure and simple, but not even particularly good eye candy. Also stars Cole Hauser and Chris "Ludicris" Bridges. 
Alex and Emma (PG-13) Art imitates life and vice versa in this latest romantic comedy from director Rob Reiner. Luke Wilson plays a writer under pressure to finish the novel he's dictating to a spunky but, wouldn't you know it, terribly attractive stenographer (Kate Hudson). Mirror images of the pair begin appearing in the novel-in-progress as romantic sparks fly both in the story-within-the-story and in the lives of the storytellers huddling around the laptop. Also stars Sophie Marceau and David Paymer. Opens June 20 at local theaters. (Not Reviewed)
ANGER MANAGEMENT (PG-13) Another drab installment of recycled humor starring Adam Sandler, the most typecast comic actor of our time. Sandler plays Dave Buznik, a neurotic who struggles to masquerade his angst by being non-confrontational. And after an altercation with a flight attendant, Dave is court ordered to participate in an anger management program. His therapist, Dr. Buddy Rydell (Jack Nicholson), takes an unconventional approach in treating him. Jack Nicholson is the only new element in this formulaic Sandler flick. The plot relies on the same mold as his other films. Reoccurring characters and gags are aplenty. Also stars Marisa Tomei, John Turturro, Kevin Nealon and Woody Harrelson. —Corey Myers
BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM (PG-13) A far more satisfying spin on modern gals grappling with Old World cultural values (and cliches) than My Big Fat Greek Wedding. At the center of the story is Jess (Jesminder to her parents), a nice Indian girl who just wants to follow her dream to play soccer, much to the dismay of dear old mum and dad. Much of what follows is fairly predictable but ultimately winning stuff. Director Gurinder Chadha (Bhaji on the Beach) toys with scores of cliches and conventions, but manages to transcend them all by keeping a firm grip on the bottom line: creating appealing and believable characters, and giving them an interesting and convincing world to live in. The movie gives us a little bit of everything, crossing smoothly from genre to genre and packing all of its elements tightly together in one groovy little package: romantic comedy, coming-of-age drama, sports movie. Stars Parminder Nagra, Keira Knightley, Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Anupam Kher.
BRINGING DOWN THE HOUSE (PG-13) Steve Martin and Queen Latifah star in what the previews reveal to be the standard Hollywood comedy that starts with a wacky Internet match-up but winds up with Ms. Latifah as helper-to-the-rescue a la Mrs. Doubtfire. (Not Reviewed)
BRUCE ALMIGHTY (PG-13) You've seen the trailers and you get the drift: Jim Carrey is endowed with omnipotent power when God decides to sit back and let him run the show for awhile. It's a premise that should have led to great comedic things, but it's almost completely wasted by a lazy, by-the-numbers script that doesn't do a single thing we weren't expecting. There's a nice moment toward the beginning where Carrey parts the waters of a bowl of tomato soup, but it's all downhill from there. It's still fun watching Carrey bounce around and mug for the camera, but the movie simply lacks the imagination to provide any support or follow-through. It all feels like a weak sitcom and makes for one of the most lifeless projects the actor-comedian's ever been involved with. Also stars Jennifer Aniston and Morgan Freeman.
CHICAGO (PG-13) Rob Marshall pulls out all the stops in this lavish, big-screen adaptation of the hit Broadway musical about a 1920s chorus girl who shoots her lover, goes to jail and becomes a big celebrity. Taking place simultaneously in gritty reality and in the projected fantasies of its characters, the movie cleverly folds its story into a series of show- stopping musical numbers. Stars Renee Zellweger, Richard Gere, Catherine Zeta-Jones, John C. Reilly and Taye Diggs.
CORAL REEF ADVENTURE (G) Another quality IMAX production from the acclaimed team of MacGillivray Freeman (who seem to be able to do this IMAX thing in their sleep), Coral Reef Adventure is a fascinating and somewhat frightening look at an exotic and rapidly disappearing underwater world. Music by flag-waving hippie diehards Crosby, Stills and Nash brings home the environmental message concerning the destruction of the reefs (from a deadly combo of over-fishing and global warming), but the movie has its moments of fun as well. 1/2
DADDY DAY CARE (PG) Eddie Murphy is back with another mediocre comedy aimed at pleasing children. Murphy plays Charlie, a family man who loses his well-paying product development job and finds himself reluctantly in the role of a stay-at-home dad. After discovering that fellow co-worker Phil (Jeff Garlin, HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm) is in the same boat, the two decide to go professional with their parenting by opening a day care center. Predictable disaster ensues as the two find out the do's and don'ts of child care while desperately trying to stay afloat financially. Although mostly recycled potty humor and lame slap-stick, the movie features some undoubtedly cute and naturally funny kids. It also helps that Murphy's sometimes mechanical performance is stabilized by Garlin and Steve Zahn (National Security), who win more laughs than Murphy. The movie succeeds at entertaining younger audiences, but fans of old-school Eddie Murphy (Raw, 48 Hours) will be disappointed. Also starring Angelica Houston. 1/2—Leilani Polk
THE DANCER UPSTAIRS (R) Actor John Malkovich's directorial debut is most enticing for what it suggests of things to come. An imperfect film that uses South America's violent past of political coups and Marxist guerrillas for thriller effect, this adaptation of Nicholas Shakespeare's novel follows a weary detective (Javier Bardem) in an unnamed South American country trying to track down a guerrilla group staging violent murders. Malkovich too often uses the location as atmospheric palette for traditional thrills and chills, but his command of a dark, dreadful ambiance shows real promise. —Felicia Feaster
DOWN WITH LOVE (PG-13) A jumbled misfire that strains to emulate those candy-color Doris Day-Rock Hudson romantic farces of yore, but winds up just lying there. Ewan McGregor and Renee Zellweger are the would-be lovers in this convoluted mess, generating even fewer sparks than previously managed by Doris and Rock (and he didn't even like girls). The self-consciously silly story is negligible: A swinging womanizer (McGregor) jumping through hoops to get a proto-feminist writer (Zellweger) to fall for him. The movie's real concern is to replicate the style of that era, or at least of its movies, from the clothes, cars and colors, to the Technicolor-vivid and blatantly (and deliberately) fake backdrops. Down With Love doesn't quite have the guts to present itself as full-blown camp, but it does constantly dip its toes in that territory, creating a confused and labored tone that's painfully coy and far too full of itself to be very much fun at all. Double entendres drift joylessly through the air, like Austin Powers' dialogue on Thorazine, each accompanied by an annoying nudge-nudge-wink-wink from the soundtrack, as the characters go through their paces in a standard war-of-the-sexes scenario, Hollywood-style, from the early days of the so-called Sexual Revolution. This kind of material wasn't all that much fun even when Doris and Rock were doing it, and it's downright painful to see it exhumed, perfumed and paraded about again. Also stars David Hyde Pierce. 1/2
DUMB AND DUMBERER: WHEN HARRY MET LLOYD (PG-13) There's no Jim Carrey or Jeff Daniels here, just two bizarre, younger look-alikes in a prequel to the popular 1994 goof-fest. Mimi Rogers is slumming in here somewhere too. (Not Reviewed)
FINDING NEMO (PG) Although it doesn't quite scale the heights of previous Pixar projects like Monsters Inc or the Toy Story movies, this latest animated opus is still one heck of a fish story. The computer-generated visuals are as dazzling as ever, the characters are appealing and the gags are consistently clever (and typically savvy of pop culture, with frequent nods to everything from The Shining to 12-step programs). The story just feels a little less inspired this time out. This is the more traditional side of Pixar, sort of an underwater A Bug's Life — but there's still plenty of heart. The little hero's mama gets killed off in the very first scene, opening the way for a narrative that's as much about separation anxiety and overprotective (single) parents as Toy Story 2 was about childhood's end. Featuring the voices of Albert Brooks, Ellen DeGeneres, Alexander Gould and Willem Dafoe. 1/2
HOLLYWOOD HOMICIDE (PG-13) Once upon a time, Harrison Ford was a space cowboy and an adventurer, an action star whose charm and credibility took him quickly down the road to fame. What's happened to our hero? Ford has taken one lousy role after another and Hollywood Homicide is his latest blunder. Ford plays LAPD detective Joe Gavilan, a veteran of the force who spends his free time dealing in real estate and dating a psychic. Josh Hartnett is his young and unpolished partner, K.C. Calden, a spiritual soul who teaches yoga and who is not so secretly trying to pursue his "bliss" as an actor. In this latest version of the tired old cop/young cop match-up, the two are working together to solve a murder committed in a Hollywood club. Ford's acting is stiff and forced, as if he can't quite fit into the skin of his character, and Hartnett fares no better. Except for a few interesting cameos (look out for Lou Diamond Phillips), the numerous and unnecessary subplots make for a movie that drags along to its final, predictable end. Also starring Master P and Lena Olin. —Leilani Polk
THE HULK (PG-13) Ang Lee, that most poetic of filmmakers, makes a comic book movie that's — surprise, surprise — poetic. Unfortunately, it's also badly paced, convoluted and even a little bit annoying, with an endless barrage of split screens and other cleverer-than-thou pop visuals that just become too much. Eric Bana (resembling, from the right angle, a young Christopher Reeves with bad skin) plays mild-mannered scientist Bruce Banner, who, when angered, turns into the gigantic, Mean Green Machine beloved by fans of the original Hulk comic and TV show. Lee turns the story into an Oedipal freak-out about repressed memories, but the movie's freighted with silliness, beginning and ending with a blatantly computer generated central character who elicits more unintentional giggles than gasps of awe. And what can you say about a film whose big fight scene involves a mutant French Poodle? The movie follows the basic Spider-Man model — with the first half devoted to character development, and the later sections filled with action and special effects — but it makes us wait way too long for too little pay-off. Also stars Jennifer Connelly, Nick Nolte and Sam Elliott. Opens June 20 at local theaters.
THE HUMAN BODY (PG) It's hard not to feel positively microscopic while watching The Human Body, what with all those gigantic internal organs and bodily fluids filling up that seven-story-tall IMAX screen. The movie was three years in the making, but The Human Body is the culmination of decades of technological advances. Pencil-thin endoscopic cameras, thermal imaging and time-slice photography (a Matrix-like freeze-effect) are only some of the cutting-edge techniques employed to great effect here. What couldn't actually be achieved by hook or crook was simulated through computer animation that's often difficult to distinguish from the real thing. The movie is a sort of day in the life of us all, a look at the routine functions performed by many of us in the course of our daily existences, albeit as seen from the inside. 1/2
THE IN-LAWS (PG-13) A remake of the 1979 original, The In-Laws is centered on the whimsical pre-wedding adventures of future fathers-in-law Steve Tobias (Michael Douglas) and Jerry Peyser (Albert Brooks). Steve is a quick-thinking CIA agent constantly bringing his job with him wherever he goes, while Jerry is a meek podiatrist set on living an unassuming life. Once they meet, both will never be the same. The movie's forced jokes, over-the-top characters and unbelievable situations have led to the failure of many previous films, but the brilliant acting of Douglas and Brooks drags The In-Laws over those pitfalls and makes for a surprisingly decent comedy. 1/2—Chris Berger
THE ITALIAN JOB (PG-13) If you're longing for the flair of the Michael Caine original or even some exotic footage of Italy, beware (despite the title, only the brief prologue of this remake is set outside the United States). That said, this generic but energetically choreographed heist flick is passable, no-brainer fun for those able to leave expectations at the door. The movie's plot is nothing more than the boy-meets-girl of its particular sub-genre: a heist, followed by a double-cross, followed by a second heist devised and executed as payback for the first. There's the requisite geeky tech-wizard on hand, a beautiful safecracker, a dashing getaway driver, and the gang's mastermind (the ever-banal Mark Wahlberg), along with a trio of cool little red, white and blue Minis that all but steal the show. Most of the cast looks nearly as bored and robotic as Wahlberg, but several of the heist sequences are entertaining enough to compensate. Also stars Edward Norton, Charlize Theron and Seth Green. 1/2
L'AUBERGE ESPAGNOLE (R) An odd, jittery, lovely little movie about everything and nothing. No, it's not a feature-length episode of Seinfeld. L'Auberge Espagnole is the latest film from French director Cedric Klapisch (When the Cat's Away), and it perfectly captures the endless possibilities, sexy aimlessness and abrupt detours of youth. At the same time, Klapisch offers up a love letter to the city of Barcelona as poignant and perfectly realized as the cinematic poems to Paris dashed off by Truffaut and Godard all those many years ago. There's no real plot here, just a small group of international exchange students sharing an apartment in Barcelona, but the film never suffers from a lack of energy, emotion or artistic panache. Stars Roman Duris, Judith Godreche, Audrey Tautou and Cecile de France.
MALIBU'S MOST WANTED (PG-13) This film is da shiznit, in the pejorative sense. Jamie Kennedy stars as Brad Gluckman a.k.a. B-Rad, the son of a prominent politician who is campaigning for governor of California. Brad and his gaggle of gangsta wannabe friends mistake their affluent Malibu suburb for the ghettoes of south central L.A. Brad is a hopeless white rapper whose flamboyant behavior endangers his father's bid for office. Each scene becomes more painful to watch as the exaggerated gangsta persona wears thin quickly. Don't even bother leaving your hizzy for this shizzle. Also stars Taye Diggs, Anthony Anderson, Regina Hall. —Corey Myers
THE MATRIX RELOADED (R) Although this long-awaited, technically dazzling sequel to The Matrix doesn't quite succeed in positioning itself in that lofty pantheon of mythic epics that include the original Star Wars cycle and Lord of the Rings movies, it's not for lack of trying. There's more of just about everything here, from the quasi-spiritual questing of Keanu Reeves' hero-messiah, to the pumped up shock and awe of the ingenious special effects, to the sheer size of the movie's scenario. Humans are raging on against the machines in a seemingly endless series of illusionary worlds within worlds. Almost inevitably though, The Matrix Reloaded is only sporadically successful at conjuring up the sense of mystery and unlimited possibilities that took us by surprise and hooked us in the first installment. That said, if you can get past your own unnaturally high expectations, there's a lot here to make anybody sit up and take notice. The state-of-art action sequences are still as exhilarating as they come and there are moments of grand poetic excess sprinkled throughout. It all ends on a literal cliffhanger that ultimately makes it difficult to judge the movie as anything beyond a prelude to the series' grand finale. Also stars Laurence Fishburne Carrie-Anne Moss, Jada Pinkett-Smith and Hugo Weaving. 1/2
PHONE BOOTH (PG-13) A nifty little pulp thriller that's considerably more than the advance publicity would lead us to expect. Collin Farrell turns in another fine performance as an ethically challenged PR guy who finds himself trapped in a booth and in the telescopic sights of a clever psychopath with a major grudge against him. The movie-length mindfuck that ensues is quite a ride, as they say, especially considering the film's minimalist premise — a hero unable to move from a patch of ground measuring only a few square feet — and the fact that one of the two main characters is a disembodied voice. It's a slight but, in its way, perfect concept, played with precision and verve, and building skillfully on a claustrophobic tension that keeps us on the edge of our proverbial seats. At an ultra-brisk 80 minutes, this is one no-frills popcorn movie that's high energy almost all the way. Also stars Forest Whitaker and Katie Holmes. 1/2
POKÉMON HEROES(G) Yet another installment of this popular japanimation series. The little cartoon animals/ things/whatevers have a new adventure, this time at the world's largest water city, where they take another bite out of crime. Definitely a kiddie flick. Voiceovers by Veronica Taylor, Rachael Lillis, Eric Stuart and Maddie Blaustein. (Not Reviewed)
RUGRATS GO WILD (PG) Two batches of Nickelodeon cartoon characters for the price of one, although the fun factor is barely half of what you might reasonably expect from a project like this. This team-up of the animated kiddies from Nick's popular Rugrats and Wild Thornberrys TV shows does feature one nice (albeit underused) gimmick — a scratch "n' sniff card — but it's all downhill from there. The movie contains the requisite boogers and poop jokes and should do well with its primary 3- to 7-year-old target audience, but most adult chaperones will find little of interest. The script feels like it was knocked out in an afternoon, the animation has a cheaper-than-usual look, and there's almost nothing here as funny or interesting as the previous Rugrats movies, or even one of the half-hour TV episodes. Featuring the voices of Bruce Willis, Jodi Carlisle, Christine Cavanaugh and Tim Curry.
SIEGFRIED AND ROY: THE MAGIC BOX (PG) As magnificently overblown a piece of Uber Kitsch as you could ever want to find, Siggy and Roy's 3-D movie is a big, gaudy, guilty pleasure for the whole family. Stars Siegfried Fischbacher and Roy Uwe Ludwig Horn. 1/2
SWEET SIXTEEN (R) Veteran English director Ken Loach offers up yet another of his patented portraits of institutionalized underclass life in this grotty tale of a Glasgow family of petty criminals, druggies and all-around losers. Loach is playing with some well-worn narrative elements here, but he makes the material live and breathe through a love of his characters, sheer conviction, humor and a cast of mostly unknowns who seem to be essentially playing themselves. The approach is fly-on-the-wall. The young lead is a winning mix of Eminem, Johnny Rotten and Casper the Friendly Ghost. Plus, the English subtitles are crucial for rendering the thick Scottish accents decipherable to our Yankee ears. If you missed this harrowing but richly rewarding film when it played at this year's Tampa International Film Festival, this is your chance. Stars Martin Compston, Michelle Coulter and Ann Marie Fulton. Opens June 20 at Channelside Cinemas. 1/2
THRILL RIDE: THE SCIENCE OF FUN (G) IMAX technology captures every hairpin turn and stomach-turning drop of the history of thrill rides across the globe. (Not Reviewed)
TOP SPEED (NR) Another IMAX movie experience that is both entertaining and painlessly educational. Top Speed replicates the adrenaline rush of speed freaks and charts the endless human obsession of going really fast. (Not Reviewed)
WRONG TURN (R) Although there's nothing remotely original about Wrong Turn, it's not nearly as bad as the pre-opening buzz suggested. To its credit, this relentlessly dark movie avoids camp, cheese and the oh-so-clever self-referential approach. Instead it gives us a straight-up shot of inbred, cannibalistic mutant horror a la The Hills Have Eyes. Wrong Turn basically just amounts to a group of hard-bodied college kids being chased through the woods by a bunch of those aforementioned I.C.M.H.'s (Inbred Cannibalistic Mutant Hillbillies), but the movie is appropriately atmospheric, briskly paced and includes a handful of genuinely creepy moments. There are even some valuable life lessons imparted: 1. Never, ever take the short cut. 2. Everybody in the rural South apparently has really bad teeth. 3. West Virginia, contrary to the PR, is not for lovers – unless they don't mind sharing quality time with I.C.M.H.'s. Stars Desmond Harrington, Eliza Dushku and Emmanuelle Chriqui. 1/2
X2 (PG-13) Here is an action-fantasy blockbuster that begs to be taken seriously, even as it entertains the hell out of us. The story is richer and more intricate than in the original X-Men (itself a pretty fair ride), and the characters are fleshed out in ways that make them even more intriguing. On the surface, Singer's film has all the black/white, good/evil dichotomies necessary to fuel a good action flick, but the movie also reveals all sorts of subtleties and ambiguities. This time, the mutants find themselves in the middle of a sinister plot hatched by various forces bent on jump-starting an all-out war between humans and mutants, forcing them to team up with their old nemesis, the uber-mutant Magneto (Ian McKellen). The movie is filled with uneasy alliances: conflicted heroes who do bad things and conflicted villains who do good things. Contradictory agendas blow up in more than one face, dangerous secrets are revealed and a main character or two bites the dust. Also stars Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Famke Janssen, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos and Brian Cox.
Reviewed entries by Lance Goldenberg unless otherwise noted
This article appears in Jun 18-24, 2003.