Craigslist personals ads are clearly the future of mating. Admit it, some of those cell phone shots of dudes spreading their cheeks in the mirror are of you. Being the virtually promiscuous young man that I am, I not only browse the personals for my own entertainment, I post absurd ads under the "Casual Encounters" section to see if anyone will respond. No matter how strange or perverse the post, my email inbox always fills up.
Yesterday I was feeling rather feminine, and decided to pose as a forty-seven year-old woman with a somewhat normal fetish, at least for Craigslist standards. Below is the actual ad, followed by the best of the over one hundred and twenty-five responses it received.
tampa bay area craigslist > casual encounters
Fill my vagina – w4mm – 47
My vagina feels empty. I want it to be filled. I don't want to have sex, but I want it to be filled. You can put anything in my vagina. The choice is yours. I will lay on my bed and spread my legs. I'll leave the door open. You casually creep in and insert your offering into my vagina. I'll be doing this all day Sunday. Just come in and stuff my vagina with whatever you have. I want my vagina to be filled to the brim with glorious things (but not penises sorry). You can jack off too me if you want or bring a partner. I will be getting stuffed all day. Please avoid using sharp or very harmful metal objects. Other than that, you can put whatever you want in me. Stuff me!
This article appears in Apr 8-14, 2009.