Gary Johnson inadvertently summed it up.
"Right now," said the former New Mexico governor and current presidential candidate on Friday afternoon, "I am the most Googled name on the planet because last night I came up with a winning sentence on dog poop."
He was referring to the quip he made during Thursday's GOP presidential debate in Orlando that his next-door neighbor's two dogs have created "more shovel-ready jobs than this current administration." The joke was later determined to have come originally from Rush Limbaugh, but the fact that this bit of comic relief got the most play out of anything in the debate suggests that for the majority of Americans the GOP race is still on the level of entertaining diversion.
But not so last weekend in the land of Disney. Thousands of true believers attended Presidency 5, an effort by the Republican Party of Florida to make the Sunshine State even more relevant by instituting a straw poll, theoretically creating more momentum for next year's FL presidential primary — date to be determined (UPDATE: Now thought to be on January 31).
Adding buzz was a series of lectures and workshops organized by the American Conservative Union. Known for its Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) held each February in Washington, the organization decided to follow the GOP political tide to Florida last week and stage its first road show, CPAC Florida — a blockbuster slate of speakers and activists all day Friday, plus movies hosted by Citizens United, the group that won the Supreme Court decision ending the century-old ban on corporate contributions to political campaigns.
The activities all took place inside the Orange County Convention Center. Five thousand attended Thursday's debate, the third in 15 days, where they saw the one-time supernova in the race, Rick Perry, lay another egg.
Perry remains the favorite of the Tea Party brigade, but Mitt Romney has skillfully exploited a vulnerability that is hurting the Texas governor in the primary — the issue of illegal immigration.
Most rank-and-file conservatives these days say the issue is pretty simple: What part of "illegal" don't you understand?
(Readers might recall the memorably explosive exchange between Romney and Rudy Giuliani at a debate in St. Pete's Mahaffey Theater in 2007, each candidate accusing the other of providing a haven for undocumented immigrants.)
Supporters of Perry and his predecessor in Austin, George W. Bush, would say that because Texas is a border state the situation there is much more nuanced. When Perry introduced a measure a decade ago to give children of undocumented immigrants access to in-state tuition rates at Texas public colleges and universities, it was passed almost unanimously by the Legislature.
Former St. Pete Mayor Rick Baker, who was Romney's state co-chair last time around but is coyly keeping his options open in 2012, says the immigration situation is a tough nut to crack. Though maintaining the standard line that the number one priority is to defend the border, he sympathizes with Perry to an extent.
"I'm not sure I would lower the tuition rate," he said during a CPAC break, but he did acknowledge the need for "real-life solutions" regarding the problem of illegal immigration.
CPAC attendee Elvira Hasty from Ponte Vedra Beach in North Florida is a huge Perry supporter, and says the immigration issue doesn't faze her about the Texas governor. Nor does his blunt talk about Social Security's future. "We want honesty! We are not stupid people," she exclaimed, accusing Romney of condescending to voters about the issue.
She's also with Perry on the issue of global warming, which she, like the majority of her party, thinks is a scam. Though she likes Romney personally, she disdains what she perceives as his lack of authenticity. "He doesn't speak truly to me. He's too political, that's what we're trying to get away from."
CPAC Florida invited the presidential candidates to speak for 10-15 minutes each. Viewing them live, it became apparent why Herman Cain and Michelle Bachmann were considered the stars of the moment earlier in the campaign season.
Both speak in Tea Party-ese, and distinguish themselves from the field by the fact that they're not white guys. Though it's been rarely noted, Cain is the first serious GOP black candidate to run for the nomination other than Alan Keyes in 1999-2000, and that seems to delight some old-time Republicans who cheered him on enthusiastically. Due to a cold that made his usual dulcet tones even more resonant, Cain seemed to mesmerize the crowd with his delivery, even when the content was banal. For instance, here's his solution to dealing with China: "Let me tell you what the Cain strategy relative to dealing with China on all these issue is. It's three simple words: Outgrow China, and the rest of the world, and we won't have to look back."
Bachmann over-articulates, as if the audience needs her words spelled out for them. Her sing-songy delivery reached its peak when she invoked Calvin Coolidge's line that the greatest privilege ever accorded to the human race is to live under the U.S. Constitution. Pausing between each word, she intoned, "That's. My. View. Too."
No one else stood out, except for maybe Jon Huntsman, the good-looking 51-year-old former Utah governor. He has a sterling resume, but his somewhat moderate brand of politics is persona non grata in a Tea Party-influenced GOP. Some have speculated that he's laying down his marker for 2016, but if he doesn't do decently in the early primary states next year, it's doubtful he'll merit reconsideration next time.
One of the funniest unintentional lines of the afternoon had to be when, halfway through his speech, he paused and said that he held some beliefs "that I know some in this room may not share. I believe in science."
Obama-bashing is de rigueur in such proceedings. But it was Wayne LaPierre, chairman of the National Rifle Association, who took the honors for over-the-top paranoia.
After losing the bitter 2000 election, Democrats as a national party have essentially dumped gun control as a political issue, conceding it to the NRA. Even after the attempted assassination of Arizona Congresswoman Gabby Giffords in January, when legislation banning the high-capacity ammunition clips used in the shootings was introduced, Obama did absolutely nothing to move the issue, thwarting gun-control advocates.
Yet, despite overwhelming evidence that the president is simply not going to go there, LaPierre went nuts.
Predicting that Obama will say he hasn't pushed for any gun control laws and hasn't pushed to renew the assault weapon ban that expired in 2004, LaPierre added, "He'll offer the 2nd Amendment lip service, and hit the campaign trail saying he's actually been good for the 2nd Amendment, but it's a big fat, stinkin' lie, just like all the other lies that come out of this administration."
LaPierre said it was part of a "massive conspiracy to deceive voters and hide his secret desire to destroy the 2nd Amendment in this country." He then said insiders met to formalize a "conspiracy of public deception" to try to guarantee his re-election by making sure never to talk about gun laws.
A massive conspiracy? Or maybe just good politics?
The movement took its own temperature in discussions on the main stage and in various ballrooms.
Should there be a truce on social issues in the 2012 campaign? That was the question introduced by baby-faced former Christian Coalition head Ralph Reed, now a mature 50. Reed's answer? Unsurprisingly, it was "no."
Somewhat less predictable was a panel discussion titled "Recruiting the Next Generation of Conservative Activists: Are Youth Awakening from an Obama Hangover?" Jeffery Nelson with the non-partisan Intercollegiate Studies Institute said that, although polls show a softening in support of Obama among young voters who voted overwhelmingly for him in 2008, it "doesn't mean that they're in the conservative camp. It just means that the cult of personality is wearing off."
That seems to be the case in Florida. New poll numbers from Quinnipiac University last week showed Floridians disapproving of Barack Obama, the man they voted for in 2008, by a 57-39 percent margin, his worst score in any poll by that firm in any state in the country.
The P5 vote wasn't the only straw poll in town. Florida CPAC held one on the race for Senate. After seeing all four candidates speak, one could be forgiven for asking: Is that all there is?
Jessica Griffin from Central Pasco County voted for the winner of that poll, former South Florida state Representative Adam Hasner, but told CL, "I'm not satisfied with any aspect of the field."
Hasner has gone hard right this year to win Tea Party love, and said last week that he blocked Charlie Crist's "efforts to ban offshore drilling," and "shredded" his plans for a "cap and trade" scheme. In fact he co-sponsored a 2008 energy bill that declared it was in the state's best interest "to pursue a market-based emissions program, such as cap and trade, to address greenhouse gas emissions.
Hasner took 34 percent of the vote, retired U.S. Army Reserve Colonel Mike McCalister finishing second with 30 percent, George LeMieux 24 percent and Craig Miller 12.
McCalister is an ass-kickin' Great Santini-like former military man who talked at length about what he would do if he were to make it to Washington.
Saying he's tired of the president "apologizin' to the world for who and what we are and it's gonna stop in 2012," he later invoked George W. Bush's "bring 'em on" line regarding terrorists, declaring, "We will hunt you down, and we will eliminate you."
In short, he's a total Tea Party guy, the real deal compared to Hasner. But some Republicans don't think he's got what it takes to beat Democrat Bill Nelson, and his chances appeared to take a huge blow after the Miami Herald's Marco Caputo reported not only that McCalister had violated U.S. Army regulations by wearing his uniform to a political fundraiser, but also had exaggerated his military record.
The humiliation of Rick Perry was complete by Saturday night, when his earnest attempt to win the straw poll was strongly rejected by the 2,657 delegates, who gave Herman Cain an overwhelming victory. (Romney finished behind Perry in third place, but unlike Perry had vowed that he wasn't competing to win.)
After Cain's stunning upset, some Florida Republicans were complaining about their party being "hijacked" by the Tea Party brigade.
Seriously? You just noticed?
This article appears in Sep 29 – Oct 5, 2011.
