I had a feeling today would be a slow movie news day the moment I got on the Howard Frankland and started blowing by everyone else in my '85 Merc. Usually, 80 mph isn't nearly enough to keep up with the other caffeinated leadfoots eager to send themselves (and the rest of us) to an early grave. But this morning, you'd have thought I was sporting a Universal Studios FastPass as I blew by all the poor souls who O.D.'d on tryptophan and were dreading being the only assholes at work while the rest of the world did its Christmas shopping for 25 percent off.
Fuckin' A, why can't EVERY DAY be like Black Friday — California has truck-only lanes; the Frankland needs to have a lane specifically for copy editors to get to work as quickly as possible so we can have that first coffee and cigarette of the day before stewing at our desks over all the fucking work we have to do. Like copy edit. And write headlines. And blog shit like this. Find a blackboard, Shelton Quarles, and make this shit happen
Sure enough, the choice tidbits are few and far between, but duty, as they say, calls. And my post-Thanksgiving gift to you: No Star Trek or Watchmen updates.
Black Friday, indeed: Steve Guttenberg says sequels to Police Academy and Three Men and a Baby are in the works. Ha, ha, good one, Steve. Seriously, stop kidding around. No, really. Shut the fuck up.
Joss Whedon ready to bring Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Hold on to your hormones, ladies: Johnny Depp and Christian Bale are respective adversaries John Dillinger and Melvin Purvis in Michael Mann's Public Enemies, a Cream Team pairing sure to keep theater ushers everywhere on "moist-seat alert." Have your canisters of talcum powder ready, boys!
Tom Tykwer's The International is set to open next year's 59th Annual Berlin Film Festival. Normally I wouldn't post this kind of Eurocentric fare, but Tykwer's Run Lola Run is one of my favorite films, and with Clive Owen and Naomi Watts starring, I can't wait to get a look at this. (Unless, of course, the buzz is really bad, in which case I'll slam the film sight unseen.)
And finally, some strong Oscar buzz is swirling around Clint Eastwood's performance in the upcoming Gran Torino.
See, I told you there'd be no Star Trek or Watchmen. Have a great weekend.
This article appears in Nov 26 – Dec 2, 2008.