I'm a 20-year-old female and a junior in college. For the past few years, I've been working on becoming a journalist. But I've found myself less and less interested (and passionate) about it as time goes on. And I think I'd rather be a fetish model.
For the past year, I've been a submissive in a D/s relationship with my boyfriend. I love him VERY much, and he is more respectful toward me than any other man I've been with. Lately, we've been toying with the idea of creating a fetish-modeling website. I do not want to be shot nude or have sex on camera, but I LOVE the idea of bondage photos and pursuing this as a career, and so does he.
From the photos I've done so far, I'm pretty sure this could pay off AND be more personally satisfying than a job at a newspaper. But I'm nervous about what my family and friends will say when they realize I'm never going write for the New York Times. —Kinky Coed
Journalism or fetish modeling, journalism or fetish modeling — gee, which career is right for you?
Um, KC? If you bothered to read either of the newspapers you cite as possible future places of employment, you would know that times are tough at daily newspapers. The Internet ate their business model — so long, lucrative classified ads! hello, "citizen journalists"! — and right now, it's all layoffs and buyouts all the time at daily and weekly newspapers. If you care so little about journalism that you're tempted to make a career of posting bondage pictures to a Web site instead, KC, then don't go into journalism. Leave the few jobs that remain at newspapers to people who have some passion for the field.
So it's fetish modeling for you, right? Not so fast, kinkster. Porn companies, large and small, are experiencing similar financial difficulties. Just as many people are willing to write for free online, many millions of people are willing to post everything from "tasteful" fetish shots to hardcore porn online for free. So while there may be a handful of people out there who'll pay to see you tied up, you're probably not going to make enough money as a fetish model to support yourself.
So you might want to think of some other line of work, something with more job security and better long-term prospects — perhaps banking or real estate?
I'm a 28-year-old woman. I've been with my current boyfriend for five years. He's married and has been telling me the whole time that he's going to leave his wife eventually. There's always an excuse: a crisis with the kids, money problems, etc. I've been stupid to stay with him for so long, but I just can't keep away from him.
I just found out I'm pregnant, and I haven't told my boyfriend. This is the second time we've been pregnant. Last time he reacted very badly, and I miscarried after a few weeks. I know he'll want me to get rid of the baby, but I'm going to keep it.
Whenever his wife goes away, I go over to the house to spend time with him. I've been planting evidence of our affair around the house in the hopes his wife will find it. So far, no luck. I'd like him to be man enough to leave her, but that's probably never going to happen. I could leave him, but if I do, I want to make sure he's miserable. I'm not going to vanish from his life and leave him all happily ever after. I'm thinking of going and telling his wife. What do you think? Is there any way I can force him to tell her?
Now The Other Mom
No advice for you, NTOM, but plenty of prenatal sympathy for a poor unfortunate fetus who deserves better parents or his very own miscarriage.
This article appears in Mar 18-24, 2009.