Joe Romah (L) and his band, Row Jomah. Credit: RowJomah/Facebook

It started off innocuous enough.

Someone would approach, ask me a question, wait for an answer and leave. Sometime later, maybe passing in the hall, I would be stopped by a group of kids who had questions of their own. After awhile, it became strange. These folks were obviously seniors (in my private Catholic high school, seniors had the privilege of wearing different shirts). I thought, “I am a freshman. Shouldn’t they know the answers to the questions they’re asking?”

Editor's note: Joe Roma is the frontman for Clearwater rock outfit Row Jomah.

It didn’t take long before I realized, “Oh, of course. They’re asking me questions to hear me stutter.”

Because I, in fact, am and for all my life have been, a stutterer; in many ways worse than some, yet also better than some. Something like 90% of stutterers will more or less grow out of it by adulthood. I guess I was just lucky.

But no stutterer is ever “cured.” It is a lifelong struggle even for those who are able to mostly control it. For stutterers of any severity, the anxiety of knowing that your next word, perfectly formed in your head and waiting to come out, may not make it past your lips without a series of contortions, ticks, drawn out letters or sometimes no sound at all, can be unbearable.

Worse yet, once you’re free and clear to the other side of your stutter, is the reaction of others. Sometimes a smile will cross their face, usually not malicious but uncontrollable. Sometimes instead of a smile you’ll get a frown, or their eyes will dart around the room for anything else to look at. Meant in comfort as it may be, sympathy is always the worst for me. I knew deep down, they felt “sorry” for me and assumed some mental issue was the route cause of my stutter.

Watching the Democratic National Convention, one of the presenters was a 13-year-old boy from New Hampshire. Brayden Harrington is a stutterer, and incredibly brave as he was, I know he has experienced all these things, too.

It’s hard to believe this wonderful young man who spoke so eloquently about his speech impediment to a national audience could ever be made fun of or laughed at, but I know he has been, because all stutterers have been.

Yet while stuttering can be debilitating, it’s in no way indicative of mental deficiency. Most stutterers are bright individuals who, if given the correct support structure, can go on to do great things. From Winston Churchill to Jimmy Stewart, from James Earl Jones to Marilyn Monroe, from King George VI to Samuel L. Jackson, stutterers are world leaders and famous actors. They are kings and emperors, titans of industry and entertainers.

I knew Joe Biden stuttered before it became common knowledge. Like I said, stuttering is never “cured,” and the bond of shared experience amongst stutterers is such that, where most of the world sees a twist of the tongue or pensive pause, we know what is really afoot.

And I know that when Joe Biden’s political opponents point to his stuttering as evidence of him losing his mental acuity—while this attack is no different from the multitude of times all stutterers have been denigrated for their impediment—it makes it no less disgusting.

Through no fault of his own, Joe Biden was born a stutterer and will be one for the rest of his life. That he has not let it defeat him, and in fact has lived a life full of purpose and good character should be celebrated, no belittled. It is totally legitimate to have honest policy and ideological differences without resorting to the school recess bully’s favorite tactics. Having a speech impediment is hard enough without such stresses.

As a fellow stutterer, I am incredibly proud of Brayden for being such a strong young man and for not letting his speech impediment stop him from living the life he wants. I can only hope I show the same strength in my life and can be the example he is. And I am proud of Joe Biden for not letting people’s vial and negative implications because of his speech impediment keep him from being a man who still cares for someone like Brayden, and someone like me.

We stutterers, after all, have to stick together.

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