*I have a new goal, it isn't lofty but it is important to the world: Get more people to read this one blog post over the next week than bought Heidi Montag's new album last week. The magic number? 1,000. Tweet, email and Facebook the hell out of this thing so I can finally show Heidi who's boss. Booyah Heidi Montag, booyah in your plastic-y face.
*Headline of the Week: Tents Erected Around Sex Clinic Reportedly Housing Tiger Woods… So. Many. Jokes. Where to begin?
*Kristen Stewart is befriending strippers and hates boredom. I think those two things may be related, I know I never get bored when helping all my stripper friends decide between the clear light-up heels and the more understated sparkly stilettos to match their newly bedazzled thong. Not boring, awesome.
*I could only get about 30% through this article about Scott Baio before I realized that as much as I love Twitter, it has done something detrimental to society. It has made irrelevant former celebrities relevant once again. Charles is no longer in charge, please, stop caring what he tweets about.
*I don't know where all this Twilight news is coming from but I am not opposed to it. Hey, here is something else I am not opposed to, Robert Pattinson all bearded out (pictured above) like a sexy, bloodsucking, lumberjack looking to conquer the wild… and my heart.
After the jump, news from Sundance, some model girl naked in GQ (pics NSFW), the King of Ireland and John Mayer's sexiness.
This article appears in Jan 20-26, 2010.