AltDotPop: Miley Cyrus and Her Bong, Ke$ha's Leaked Sex Photos, Jon Gosselin Gets a Real Job, Willow Smith's New Haircut and more

Willow Smith's new haircut seems to be jumping on this whole "The Beatles are cool bandwagon."


Now, let's get sexy... you like band-aids on ladies' legs? Christina Aguilera's got that. How about a little pudge in the tummy region? She's got that too. I don't want you to think that I am picking on her, I am not. I currently have about three to five bruises on my pale legs and I am sure that she still looks better than me in that sequined getup. Let's all just learn yet again, that you shouldn't take pictures you do not want seen and walk away from this a little bit wiser, shall we?

I know I talk about Miley Cyrus a lot, but let's be honest, she is a hot mess. Some people, namely Miranda, Chris, Brandon and Guest, do not find my Miley-related rants to be humorous. Oddly, I find you all hilarious. What do you think of her bong video? For reals, let me know, I want to read your defense of her use of hallucinogens.

Enough about Miley, let's move onto someone who is universally agreed upon to be a disaster, Ke$ha. Photos have leaked of the "singer" making out with a furry man and that same man going down under, if you know what I mean. I wonder if this is the guy she wrote "Your Love Is My Drug" about...  he has a beard and she appears to like it.


Follow me on Twitter @MandaAnn and keep up with all your pop-culturely needs at @AltDotPop.

Prince William and Kate Middleton have released their official engagement photo. Apparently, no one told people in England that beige isn't great for William's skin tone. Also, oh my god they look so uncomfortable, amirite?

Jon Gosselin, aka "Little Ed Hardy," is pulling me to the dark side a bit with his new-found normalcy and lack of douchey antics. Dude even got a normal job in IT and a teensy, tiny apartment. I hate both the Gosselins but this week, Jon is the lesser of two evils... and I haven't said that the last season of Jon and Kate plus Eight.

New couple alert!!!!!! Blake Lively and Ryan Gosling have been spotted in NYC and are assumed to be dating. Can I get an "awwwww" and a new Gossip Girl -themed Fuck Yeah Ryan Gosling. I suggest "Hey Girl, I don't care that you slept with Chuck and Nate and Dan and probably Blair, whatevs. I still love you girl. XOXO."

Chris Rock saved the day by telling jokes while a pregnant woman went into labor at a mall. I don't have anything to say about this but I think it's a humorous visual so I wanted to make sure you all got to read about it. Moving on.

My favorite story of the week and maybe the year has got to be Miley Cyrus, taking some bong hits, laughing her ass off and letting a friend record it. The most entertaining part though, is the background music, yes friends, that is Bush's "Comedown." I have a theory that involves this party happening in 1995 and that is just a girl who looks like Miley and happens to have a boyfriend named Liam as well. Hannah Montana would never be so irresponsible!

My theory sucks, Billy Ray basically threw it out there on Twitter, that his daughter is a bong-smoking party animal and he has no control of the situation and he is all sad-faced about it. I want to make an achey-breaky heart joke but I heard it was already done 1,472,863 times.

After the jump, Willow's new haircut may prevent her from whipping it back and forth, Christina Aguilera's leaked closet pics are not that awesome, the best comments you will read on this week and Ke$ha gets naughty with a boy, takes pictures and here we are (you have been warned)...

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