Welcome to the last day of even quasi-productive office work until the calendar flips. Let's waste just a bit of it, shall we?
St. Pete became the first city in Florida to formally commit to achieving 100% clean, renewable energy, when Mayor Rick Kriseman presented a "roadmap" toward that end. If only there were ways to use wastewater to convert sewage into energy. (That's not a joke. Click those links and get curious, St. Pete.)
It's here! Consumer interest organization Florida Public Interest Research Group (PIRG) released its 31st annual holiday-season report on dangerous toys — the kind that are hazardous to kids, not the awesome late-'80s Texas dirt-rock band responsible for "Teas'n Pleas'n." Number One on the list of dangerous toys for 2016? A Republican ballot. ZINGZINGZING!
A bomb threat cleared a New Port Richey Beall's, along with every other store in the strip mall. Perhaps coincidentally, the cops were already on-site investigating a shoplifting case at the exact same time. Did we say "perhaps coincidentally"? We meant "of course it was the other teen/tweaker/star-crossed lover, the one outside in the car who will never, ever be able to afford to pay back the cost of all the resources that phone call needlessly wasted."
And finally, St. Pete cops are on the hunt for a woman who picked a guy's pocket in a convenience store, then mooned him and took off when he tried to stop her. Is petty crime a crime when you get a show to go with it? The three-card monte dudes say no.
This article appears in Nov 17-24, 2016.