Although swingers are thought of as more open-minded in terms of sex than your average vanilla couple, somethings are still taboo. Recently, I've met several people who participate in the swinging lifestyle with family members. Some attend clubs together in hopes of finding sex separately. Others have sex in the same room while some even have sex together.
When I first spoke with a few "family swingers," a range of emotions ran through me, from shock and disgust to complete confusion. The easiest family swinger situation for me to understand is when family members simply frequent swingers events together. An off-premise club really is just like any other club. If you meet someone you'd like to have sex with, you still have to go somewhere else to do so. Other family members who either have sex in front of, or with a family member, often chose the swinging lifestyle as a forum for this behavior, as swingers tend to be a bit more open-minded about such taboo practices.
I recently raised the issue of family swingers with a few swinging couples. When asked if any would ever consider having sex with a sibling, they all answered with a quick and absolute no. However, the issue quickly becomes blurred when framed a different way.
Would you ever have sex with two incredibly attractive sisters?
For most, especially the men, the answer was a resounding yes. A mother and daughter team drew a mixed response, depending on the age difference between the two. Some said yes, but only with the stipulation that the mother and daughter didn't play together.
My point is that just the mention of incest often creates such a strong negative response. However, when the issue is re-framed, this practice may be seen in a more sympathetic light. I'm still not comfortable with even the idea of a family member participating in any aspect of the lifestyle with me, but that doesn't mean that others should feel a similar aversion. What do you think?
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This article appears in Dec 23-29, 2009.